It was semi-final night on The X Factor, and the judges were pretty much unanimous – everyone deserved a place in the top three! There wasn’t one of that super-talented foursome who deserved to be taking the next bus home. They were obviously using the job description “judge” fairly loosely, as usual. It’s times like this I miss Randy Jackson.
The first half of the show was billed as a “tribute” to Michael Jackson. The great man must be looking down from his cloud now feeling that his career has finally been summed up in fine style now he’s had his work interpreted by a talent as stellar as Stacey Solomon. Actually no-one was listening to Stacey’s voice, which is perhaps a good thing. They were all wondering why she’d forgotten to put on her trousers. Dannii’s continued attempts to portray Stacey as some kind of sex goddess come badly adrift the minute Dagenham Stace stops singing and starts talking, and this week she had the added pressure of having to sing and walk on chairs at the same time. Her second-half song was ‘Somewhere’, from West Side Story, a song which stunningly showcased how mediocre her voice really is. “You’re a star!” gushed the judges. “You deserve a place in the final!”
The class act of the night, once again, was Joe. His version of ‘She’s Out of My Life’ was beautiful. Throughout the competition Joe has been the most faultless vocally, but in recent weeks he seems to have somehow connected emotionally with the songs in a way he wasn’t before, and this performance was moving and real, and note perfect. His second song was ‘Open Arms’, and again he put it across as though he was really feeling it. “You deserve a place in the final!” the judges all cried, and this time they were right.
Olly Murs. Oh, Olly, you’re a lovely lad, everybody says so, but I wish you’d stop doing that beckoning gesture with your big hands. And that thing you do with your knees. And the dad-dancing. It’s distracting and annoying and it’s made me not like you any more because you’re just plain bloody irritating. ‘Can You Feel It’ was ok, in the sense that no-one will ever be able to do that song like the Jacksons did that song, but however well Olly might have been singing, it was all overshadowed by the hands and knees and Brian Friedman throwing his entire box of sequins at the production (he’s missing John and Edward, I reckon). The second song was ‘We Can Work it Out’, done the Stevie Wonder way, and it was actually pretty good. The judges all agreed that Olly deserved a place in the final, and I have to agree too if it means Stacey goes home.
Danyl went for a crowd-pleaser in the form of ‘Man in the Mirror’, but didn’t please this particular crowd member by changing the lyrics. Again, it was ok. His second song was Whitney Houston’s shriek-fest ‘I Have Nothing’, and it was fantastic, almost as good as Joe in fact. The judges semi-apologised for being horrible to him all series and said he really did deserve a place in the final.
So it’s up to the wisdom of the crowd to work out which three really do deserve a place in the final. As long as Joe is there, justice will have been done.
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